Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
Randomize
