Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
i just shit an entire soup salad and breadsticks from the olive garden... bud light wins again.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
Randomize
