I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
Yea i'm supposed to have jury duty on monday. Hope they don't mind me still being drunk.
Na you can't get charged for public intoxication unless you're outside. I checked.
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Randomize
