It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
Randomize
