If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
