I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
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