Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
Randomize
