google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Randomize
