she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
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