margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
Randomize
