C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
I'm worried I'm going to miss my flight so I set a series of alarms on my phone to act as checkpoints to make sure I'll be there. 2am-stop drinking; 4am-stop fucking stephanie, get some sleep; 5am-wake up, fuck stephanie once more; 6am-get to the airport
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
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