dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
I am never drinking with the goths again.
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
Randomize