I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
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