he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
Maybe singing about how you'd bang Morgan Freeman to the tune of Single Ladies while holding champagne and a box of Cheerios wasn't the best first impression on his parents
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
Randomize
