i just identified you from a description of your pipe
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
Randomize
