Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
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