when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
Randomize
