Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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