Pregnant stripper...not hot.
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
Randomize