you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
Blood and glitter go together right?
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
