I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
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