Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
Randomize
