She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
Randomize
