the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
