Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
Randomize
