I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
and this is why i am such an inspirational person, i am the Joel Osteen of alcoholics.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize
