Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
I just realized my hands still smell like your cock. Which is awesome, but I wonder if the clerk at the store appreciated it.
I feel bad. I'm the reason hand sanitizer exists.
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
Over Bumbled last night. I think I set my dog up on a date Sunday afternoon. I have to drive him, meet the other dog’s dad and secretly drink a bottle of champagne from a “water bottle”. This is not what I expected 30 to be like.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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