FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Randomize
