TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
Randomize
