Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
Randomize
