I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
Randomize
