dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
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