ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
He kissed a someone with a penis
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
Randomize