But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
Randomize
