Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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