Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
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