just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Randomize
