this boner is exhausting
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
Randomize
