can you come get me and bring me shorts and a shirt
maybe shoes and water too
oh and maybe a noose to hang myself
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
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