So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
I skipped work to stalk him.
i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
Gay?
German.
Pity.
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
Randomize
