DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
Randomize
