Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
Randomize
