he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
she pinky promised me she was 18
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Randomize
