I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Randomize
