I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
Randomize
