i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
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