why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
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