You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
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