Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
Randomize
