I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
Sometimes while peeing I'll go hands free, put my arms up by my chest and make claw hands, and pretend I'm a new type of dinosaur called Dickosaurus Rex.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
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